Missing Betty

My dear love Cameron,

We had such a wonderful weekend with Betty. I know, she is very special to you – I know this because she is to me, too.  She came to visit for your birthday, and while I keep thinking that the weekend was peaceful and low-key, I know that for you it wasn’t. There were new toys, new things to talk about, a car, cake and ice cream, and best of all Betty’s hugs, smiles, and laughter.

I’ve been impatient with you last night and tonight. You’re having troubles adjusting to the idea that this person you love so much isn’t here right now, and trying to get some stability back. Which means you’re pushing buttons and limits. Betty’s disappearance, from your perspective, has unsettled your world and brought the Not Well Behaved Lions back, or since they’re in Cuba apparently there are Other Lions now too. I have to remind myself that you lack the experience that time will give you. When I say we’ll see her soon, you have no idea what soon I mean – soon tomorrow? Soon next week? Those soons you grasp. Soon might mean not until May. That’s an eternity for you, I know. I also know that you’ll soon ease back into normal life. And hopefully soon go back to not taking an hour to fall asleep at night, and staying asleep the whole night.

Soon? Please?

All the same, I wouldn’t change things for one moment. I loved this weekend visit, short though it was. We just hung out, and it felt like Betty lived close and we’d seen each other just a short time ago. So instead of brushing your missing her aside, as I tried to do with fun this evening, I tried a different tactic. We talked, in the darkness of your room, snuggled up together, about the weekend. And about what you liked about it – the recycling trucks, the beach, watching Cars, playing with Betty. We talked about where Betty lives, and I was surprised that you have some fairly clear memories of the house and the playground nearby. We talked about missing Betty, and how that’s because we love her, and we hope to see her again soon. I left you thinking about that, all warm and bundled up in your blankets. You sound like just maybe you’ll fall asleep soon.

I love you,

Mommy

(And I love you too, Betty!)

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