Boundary Testing

What happens if I pester Mommy to do something she’s said she won’t do, then fly at her karate chopping, pushing, shoving, and hitting when she still won’t do it? (answer: we go inside for the rest of the evening and I get a five minute – note, longest ever in my life – time out)

How many times can I run a car over Mommy’s feet before she gets mad? (answer: five. Two got her stepping away from me.Three got her counting, fourth was “two”, fifth was time out)

How many times can I say I want to watch Curious George before Mommy flips and goes primal?
(answer: still undetermined, but man I was getting close)

Mommy’s told me to go to the living room to play. How many times can I say “No”? (answer: something like five. She carried me there, yelling stuff the whole way, plunked me in the middle of the room and left me there!)

She said to stay in the living room … she’s so mad she’s yelling … wonder what happens if I stand one step out of the living room? (answer: after repeatedly refusing to go back into the living room, I got a time out in my bedroom)

Mommy’s sitting on the floor talking on the phone with Granna, what happens if I shove a book in her face? (answer: Mommy stands up and says with far more patience than she would have had Granna not been listening, “No, I cannot read to you right now.”)

What does Mommy do if I wave a toy I’m not allowed to take in the tub two centimeters over the water, saying I’m just pretending? (answer: Mommy stalks out of the bathroom while snarling that if that toy gets wet it will be taken away for a week. I’ve hidden it. Mommy isn’t sure where or why)

*************************************************************************

Excuse me a minute.

RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

Okay. Time to regroup.

Let’s start with a deep breath and some reality.

This last week and a bit have been more than a little unsettling to the normal routine of daily life here. Cameron is of course testing his boundaries. His world got a little rocked, and it’s time to re-establish what the rules are.

I know very well that yelling was counter productive here. I know it was giving him a reaction, and egging him on. But dammit, I was mad. And I’m still sick. And I had a shitty day where on BOTH encounters with my boss I looked like a totally incompetent ditz because I was dizzy and ill but didn’t think to tell him I’m sick.

The day was not entirely awful. Yeah, it started off with nightmares and lack of sleep, lateness for work, and my performance at work not being what one could call stellar. So here goes with happinesses, to re-frame my day before I go to bed.

Cameron was thrilled to see me at daycare. Big hugs and kisses, and he excitedly told me what they’d done and showed me a toy. At the bus stop we played ‘chase’ around a bench, and he picked dandelions for me.

The grocery store has removed its tanks of crabs and lobsters. My guess is that they weren’t selling well enough to justify the expense of keeping live ones. But Cameron misses them! He used to visit them each trip, greet them, count them, and we’d chat about what they were doing. So now he goes to the corner where they used to be, and pretends to say hi to them. “There are four, Mommy. Say hi to the four crabs, Mommy!”

I bought a new lip balm a week ago, coconut and tangerine scented. For the first time in months, my lips aren’t chapped. Yay! Will have to get their hand lotion, as due to this illness I’ve been compulsively washing my hands, and they’re cracked and desiccated.

Cameron now loves to be ‘bounced’ on the trampoline. There are two forms that ‘bouncing’ takes. The first is timing my bounces with his so he is slingshot-ed extra-high! He’s starting to be able to stick the landings, too. The second is just as hilarious. He sits or lies down, and I jump a few feet away, causing him to bounce up too.

After all was said and done, Cameron and I had a lovely storey time. First, he helped me put his clothes away in his drawers, and he loved showing me that he knows where they go. Then he picked his stories – an ocean alphabet book, and a space shuttle book, both gifts from Grandma and Grandpa from their Florida trip – and we snuggled in the comfy chair to read. He was almost asleep at the end, and wanted to be carried to his bed.

At the end of such a long day, what else was I going to do? I curled up in Cameron’s bed with him, arms around him, holding his little hand. I kissed him, and told him I loved him as he fell asleep

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2 responses to “Boundary Testing

  1. Congrats on your blog anniversary 🙂 and good luck reigning Cameron back in. We had to do some serious reset with our 2.5 year old lately, and I wrote a post about it titled “Who is the Boss”. It seems that counting works best for her in stopping undesired beahvior, while timer really helps with voluntary transition from one activity to anothe.

  2. i think it’s the fifth symptom of that cold they had.

    Lolo – same thing. yesterday was the first day of getting her to understand that “i want to be NICE TO YOU” is not the same thing as actually being nice to me.

    i must say, you handled picking up the phone *very* well.

    🙂

    better luck tonight.

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