I had a spectacular loss of temper that left me hoarse – although some of that I can blame on having a cold I’m sure. Actually, some of the temper tantrum too. I haven’t been looking after myself well enough, I think.
Oh, don’t worry, Cameron will be fine. Once I realized that I just couldn’t cope with one more whine, that I was going to explode even more messily than I already had if I didn’t get some me-time, I made sure Cameron was safe and went downstairs to get my neighbour. Who went up right away to be with him.
I got to go for a short walk, and sit and have a hot chocolate in a nearby café, until I lost the need to curl up in a corner and bawl. Or if not lost, at least got it under control.
Back again, I did my best to return to our usual evening, though it was a little difficult. Cameron’s evening wind-down wouldn’t have been any more interrupted had a herd of elephants stormed through the apartment. But he eventually settled.
Yet again I curled up in bed with him as he drifted off to sleep, close in my arms. Because that’s what I want when I’ve had that sort of evening. To be held.